journal · of · zoë · alleyne · washburne · : · first · mate

It's been a few days now since I've done much of anything relating to the ship. Its not a normal feeling. But I'm gonna need to start adjusting to this whole situation more than I have been. Its time to face it, I guess.

I need to talk to Wash and start getting some goals and things laid out - we need to start looking at this whole thing as parents, and adults rather than just two people in love onboard the crazy ship. This is us, too, now.

Well, today's the anniversary of one of the worst moments I've lived through. Glorious U-Day. Someone had to win - but it was the side that fought to control others - to take every last piece of independance out of the 'verse. Not my finest hour.

On a higher note: I am pregnant. Everyone knows now, and it seems like things won't be as hard as I thought. Looks like Wash and I are gonna leave the ship, just for a while to have the baby. I'll miss Serenity. But that's not for a while.

We need to have a job. Wash and I need the money to be able to leave the ship. We also need to figure out where. Somewhere safe to have a baby - but somewhere safe for us as well.

I can finally walk again... Walk with some assistance. My leg is braced so it can't bend too much, but I can move well enough. Finally Wash got some sleep, which is one less worry on my mind. We're lookin for a new job from what I've heard. I don't know why we didn't just look for one on Belariphon. Cap'n's choice would be my best guess.

I wish we could have gone on a vacation, but the Cap'n does have a point - we're too poor to make a pass through to anywhere resembling peaceful to vacation - no profit in doin nothin. I sound like Jayne when I say that. *sigh*

I was shot in the back of the knee after the drop. Two men got the drop on us headin back to Serenity. They didn't hold guns to our backs and tell us to drop the money, they just shot me in the gorram leg. This seems strange to me because more often then not, they're not interested in hurting anyone - they just want coin. I think they may have been working for the buyer who we sold the skateboards to, trying to get a free shipment.

The Cap'n got hit pretty hard in the head with a metal baton or something - I only looked for long enough to draw my gun and make sure the two men wouldn't be holdin anyone else up again.

I'm worried about Wash. He hasn't slept in days... not really slept. I miss my husband in so many ways.

We left Persephone a few days ago, now. I got my stitches out today. Our shipment is going smoothly. Wash and I have been talking about everything, which is good. I hope these questions are answered for him soon.

Not much has happened besides that. Deep space is without the excitement of seeing the Captain come back with a broken nose or Serenity being nudged. I'm not sure how all that settled, but it happened quietly.

We picked up a cargo of skateboards and are transporting them... somewhere. I don't know exactly where - I was still recouperating when the deal was made. I've already crashed twice on the skateboards - both times because one was left out.

I've had some time to think - to absorb things. I keep thinking about things... things that don't matter anymore. I can't help it sometimes. I've also found myself thinking about things that do matter. Things like a baby...

We need a vacation - Wash and I. Go to some nice secluded planet - somewhere with a nice warm bath and real food.

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I'm mobile again. Walking about the ship has been nice - very nice. We were nudged by a ship and had a few injuries, but, from what I've heard, that was not the significant part. River saved Kaylee. It was a suprise for me to hear, though, nothing about that girl should suprise me any longer.

We're a family - as much of a disjointed family as we can be. Its good to have it, though.
Wash and I have been taking our time with things, which is sweet. He wants me to heal more than anything... I'm just glad he's here.

The ship is running smoothly once more after Miranda. More than smoothly, perhaps, with Wash back. I don't rightly know how he came back, but he is - and I won't question whatever it was - so long as he is here. My back is beginning to heal nice after I broke the stitches once or twice, but it's nothin that can't heal in good time thanks to the doc.